theirs:

a zoo of dogs dressed up as other animals

elmntry:

im sick of the lies

tensioned:

why does everything close so early on sunday jesus didnt die for this

justanasshole:

thtwhitegurrl:

slutdust:

I bought my friend an elephant for their room.

They said “Thank you.”

I said “Don’t mention it.”

Is there a joke here that 15 thousand people get but I don’t?

We don’t talk about that.

gelatins:

hello, is this mcdonalds? ah yes, i would like to make reservations for 2

alegbra:

heyfunniest:

white people

I am white and I can assure you that I and my family do this exact ritual every morning to prepare for the day

ruinedchildhood:

when my mom come in my room without knocking

hipster-trichster:

I always laugh way too much when this happens across my dash

unicordian:

culpa-mia:

a story as old as time itself

o shutterstock…

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